Poem: “Just Like Me”

July 27th, 2011

Here is a poem one of our members wrote… Even though it’s from a ways back (when we had our Communities), I just had to share when I stumbled upon it! :)



Author: Justine Aubrey


The stick turned pink and that was that,

the day my old life left and would never come back.

My friends dwindled as my belly grew,

I felt alone, scared, and with out a clue.

Married, with child, at such a young age,

I watched my friends go out and play,

college, the party life, and who knows what else,

sometimes they came around, but I was always by myself.



A baby brought a joy to my life,

and also the reality that I was a mother and a wife.

People starred at the child I held, ones I used to identify with myself.

They didnt understand that my duties were at home,

sometimes it was so difficult, young and on my own.

2 a.m. feedings for us meant two different things,

while I sat up feeding baby, they were drunk eating pancakes.



They didnt understand why I couldnt stop what I do,

to go hang out with them, they didnt have a clue.

Alone, with a child, a husband, as his wife,

I felt trapped and alone, nothing for a life.

Searching with my keyboard, I came across a place,

with women just like me, young, married, kids,

curiousity struck my face…

Young Married Mommies, a group of girls like me!

I was shocked, I was excited, and most of all relieved!

My heart always told me, that life was right on track,

even though my new life took some getting used to,

and my old life would not come back.



I met wonderful women, who understood my pains,

they understood the importance of what was to be gained.

They related to my hardships, never once was judged,

for they understood being a young married mommy,

and filled my heart with love.

We share our stories, we laugh sometimes, we vent, complain and give advice.

We send congrats and internet hugs, and welcome with open arms,

to girls just like us.



I have shared the birth of one more baby,

some members did the same.

we’ve added others to our group,

with open minds and loving hearts,

because these women are just that way.

I may not see them face to face,

but thats alright to me,

and when my husband goes off to work,

sometimes I’m lonely,

but wth out fail, I can head to the net

and click just one, two, three,

and there is always something going on,

with the girls who are just like me.

March Break / Spring Break

March 16th, 2011

Well it’s a whirlwind at our house (as usual) and I know I haven’t checked in for a while (we’ve been sick) but I wanted to chat a little about March Break and what kind of activities you mommies did with your kids. What kind of child care do you rely on when they are not in school and what kind of activities do you sign them up for? For those of you with younger tots, this is something you’re about to get tossed into, so listen to what the older mommies suggest! lol ;)

I had been *really* stressed out about this coming week for basically all of 2011 to date!!! But it has gone really well so far. We had planned to send DS to the same camp as last year and now that he is older he could go to the full day option instead of just the half day for preschoolers. I called only last week to register (I know, a bit late) but luckily they had space. Luckily I had done my research and knew there was a discount for putting a camper in for the full week because the administrator distractedly tried to just charge me the daily rate x5! No thanks! My son *loves* the camp to bits. I tried to pick him up early on the first day and he would have none of that: “But it’s not pick up TIME, Mom!” and he sent me away.

As for my (much-older) DD, she wanted nothing to do with any camp. My DH joked that any idea coming from us, even if we could find a “sit around and go on Facebook and text your friends from your cell phone all day” camp somewhere, she would refuse to go just on the principle that it had been suggested by her parents. We are that hated and horrible these days. I offered her many many options including a babysitting course (you’d think the chance of making cash of her own this summer would be enticing! but no…), singing lessons, Hip Hop camp, dance camp, gmynastics camp (with or without her little bro), you name it – we researched it. But no, she insisted she wouldn’t have enough time to spend with friends or go shopping even if she were enrolled in a half-day program. And without her grand-parents to back me up (who had her more than half the week), I knew it was a fight I couldn’t win. If they were the ones having to drag her out of bed, you can be sure they would be saying “Don’t blame me, blame your big bad mommy who is making us all go through this camp thing” (have I mentioned this are my ex’s parents? her bio-dad’s folks? oh yes, it’s fun…).

But I did have a (small) victory this week… I suggested one morning that we go for a manicure at a local spa. “Invite a friend” I said, “My treat!”. She insisted everyone was busy, she wouldn’t be able to find anyone, blah blah blah. I asked her to put out a note online and on her texts and sure enough, there was a friend who was able to come along. So as usual, she ended up having a great time getting her nails done with her friend (and getting a Frappucino and having a leisurely chat session at the coffee shop) and it killed many hours during which she was not just moping around in her pyjamas bored.

Once the spring break is over for us, DD will go back to her dance lessons and we intend to put DS into gymnastics at the same place he’s done these camps a couple years in a row! They’re also both signed up for soccer this summer. We’ve had different sets of grand-parents help out with the “funding” of these activities because they can definitely get pricey, but I would definitely say it’s worth it. I started when the kids are young with little swim lessons and things like that (as babies, you go in the pool with them and then starting from around age 3, they go on their own) and it’s great to have one or two activities to keep them active during the week, especially when at least one of those extra-curricular activities is a sport or other physical activity.

So I suspect if the Question of the Month for March Roll Call on the YM Boards is about Spring Break, I can now just link over here! lol ;) but either way, I’d love to also see some comments over here too from YM mommies and others… what do you usually do for March Break? What activities have you found to be good ideas for your kids during the year? What about summer? How do you keep them from being bored during the holidays?

Starting a new chapter…

February 20th, 2011

***WARNING*** COMPLETE RAMPLE AHEAD!!!

My life has changed so much in the past few months… I graduated high school, started college, Lucas and I moved out of my parents house and are living on our own, my parents sold my childhood home and moved a state away, Dave and I broke up, and because of all of this happening in such a short amount of time I have felt very overwhelmed and confused lately. I feel like my life isn’t going in any particular direction at the moment, I get up, take care of Lucas, get ready, drop him off at daycare, go to school, pick him up, do dinner, put him to bed, do homework, watch TV, go to bed, then I wake up in the morning and do it all again. I feel like I’m going no where and the monotony of my day to day existence is driving me up a wall… I know it’s good to have a routine for both Lucas and I, I know I have to go to school and get an education so I can get a great job to support my family, I know I need to work at my crappy job to make money in the meantime, but I feel like all the fun and excitement has been taken out of my life and that I’m just constantly going through the motions like a robot. There are so many things I want for myself and Lucas in life but I just feel like I’m stuck in a spot where none of those things are attainable. Besides getting my education, I feel like nothing I’m doing right now is going to lead me anywhere. I have almost no social life, I’m very shy and awkward around new people, and I feel like I can’t relate to anyone my age anymore, which makes it hard to try to have some kind of semblance of “normalcy” in my life. Even this weekend, my mom had Lucas for a few nights, I didn’t have to work, I was free to be an 18 year old. I should have gone out, put myself out there, tried to meet new people, be a little flirty, have some fun, but instead what did I do? I stayed home alone and listen to music and cleaned out my refrigerator! I hate to complain because I know so many people have things so much worse, and all things considered my life is pretty great, I have an amazing little boy, an incredibly loving and supporting family, a roof over my head, food in my belly, clean clothes, I’m getting an amazing education, me and my family are healthy, yet even with all these wonderful things I can’t help but feel like something is missing. I just don’t have that sparkle in my eyes or that vigor for life like I once had… I hate that I feel this way because it makes me seem like a whiney brat, but I don’t know how to change it or what to do to make my life seem full and to make myself happy again… I really want to start a new chapter in my life, I want to be happy and to be able to enjoy all the little things in life, I want to be able to look back and say “wow, those were some good times”, I want to radiate self confidence and charisma, which are things that I once had that I seemed to have  misplaced. I want to have friends, have a social life, be able meet new people and even go on dates. I want to be able to balance Lucas, school, work and me time/social time without feeling incredibly overwhelmed. I know it can be done, because I was this person even just a year ago. Things are definitely a lot different now because I have a hell of a lot more responsibility than I had when we lived at home, but I don’t really even think that any of these issues I’m having stem from moving out or gaining responsibility. I really think it’s a combination of not really knowing what I want out of life and therefore having no clue where I’m heading and also breaking up with Dave who was my first love. I really, really, really hate to admit that I feel this way because of a guy, because I’ve never been one to rely on a man, but I have to admit that I really thought we were in it for the long haul, and so that whole situation threw me for a loop, and I’ve just been in a major funk since… So, in the coming weeks I’m going to try to make some changes in my life that will hopefully help me build up my confidence, I’m starting the P90X fitness program and going on a diet hoping that I’ll become less self conscious of my body, I’m going to spend more time doing things outside of the house with Lucas, I’m going to put myself out there more at school, maybe even join a club or something to help me find friends with similar interests and I’m going to start working on figuring out what my goals in life are and how to go about reaching those! I’m also going to try to stop dwelling on the negatives and the small stuff in life that I can’t control and instead stay focused on the positives. My dad has always told me that I need to be like a duck and let the sh*t roll off my back, and I think I’m really going to work hard to use that sage advice. It’s definitely going to be hard to do all these things, especially because I tend to be very jaded, cynical and pessimistic, but I’m going to do my best and work very hard to turn my frown upside down and become a better person for my son and for my sanity!!!!

Ridiculous Young Mommies

February 9th, 2011

I am so tired of hearing young moms complain about how much they have had to give up and how much their life sucks. If your child is not enough to make you happy then what is. Look into that beautiful face and tell me that you don’t smile. Yea I may wish I could go out more and do more things a normal 20 year old would do but guess what I AM NOT A NORMAL 20 YEAR OLD AND YOU ARE NOT A NORMAL YOUNG PERSON WHEN YOU HAVE A CHILD GET OVER IT!! I understand that its aggravating sometimes. I have been diagnosed with Anxiety and Postpartum Depression ever since I had Amber so I have my moments but as soon as I look into my beautiful girls’ faces i cannot help but smile. They keep me going through each day and they have made me the person I am today. If you cannot say the same or something similar then you need to sit down and reevaluate yourself. I’m sorry if I offend anyone on here, that is not my reasoning for writing this but I have some acquaintances that do not stop whining about being a young mom. YOU made the choice to have a baby at the age you did NOT society so stop blaming anything and everything else.