Journal

Week 5

(December 25th, 1998- January 1st, 1999)

Life:

Well, the first part of the week was spent getting over Christmas! Since I'd pushed myself Christmas day, even while sick, I was feeling pretty rotten the few days after but Harmony and I hung around home and rested up.
Harmony's dad was here to see her for the first time on Tuesday. It was funny to see him hold her- all guys look very uncomfortable holding babies, and Chris was no exception. I think they're all afraid of dropping the baby or something. We left a lot unresolved about how much he will be involved in our life and I still have some decisions to make about how much I actually want him to be involved in our life, especially considering his not signing the birth certificate, but I think things went ok for the few days he was here. Despite everything, I'm glad they got to meet each other.
Harmony and I spent some of New Year's Eve at a friend's party, but we got our ride home for about 11. She had her last meal of the night (and the year) while I watched the specials on TV and finished eating in time to sit up and watch the ball drop- she paid close attention to the flashing lights with eyes wide open. I gave her a big New Year's kiss and wished her a Happy New Year. So she wasn't very aware of her first New Year's, but at least we participated in some of the classic stuff. :)

Harmony's Growth:

Well, that smile on Christmas day turned out not to be an isolated incident so I'll count it as her first "real" smile. :) Since then, she's smiled many more times, usually when I surprise her with my voice. One time she smiled right after I'd finished saying to someone "She's so perfect!" Such a modest little girl! :P
Physically, she's growing in leaps and bounds. I walked over to the clinic on Monday, but they ended up being closed for the holidays, so I still have no idea how much Harmony weighs! I'm guessing somewhere in the ballpark of eight or nine pounds, maybe a little more. She's grown out of the newborn size diapers already, much to my surprise. Her head support is good- she holds it up pretty well when being held over my shoulder or on my lap as long as I'm supporting the rest of her. I don't lie her on her stomach very often, but when I have, she's made a few attempts to lift her head, although she can't get it up very high yet.
She spends more and more time alert now, and enjoys looking at the world around her very much. Her favorite thing to look at though is still the black and white checkerboard design that's taped to the crib next to where I change her- she gets very wide-eyed and quiet when she's able to see it.

"Fourth Trimester"

I'm still feeling a little worn down, especially with the holiday rush, and especially being sick! I'm still trying to solve the problem of not enough breast milk, and am still having to supplement a bottle ever so often- I'd estimate probably 3 or 4 nights of the week. I have never had to supplement more than one bottle a day though, and usually Harmony only takes an ounce or two. Usually by evening, my nipples are very sore, which is also one of the reasons I supplement. I probably could just feed her, but it would take her longer to get what she needs from almost empty breasts, and that would just make me tired and very sore. I'm using lanolin ointment on my nipples and it does seem to help out.
My incision continues to heal (and itch!) but it isn't sore unless I do a lot of lifting and such. Going out with Harmony usually leaves me sore, unless I'm getting a ride somewhere and only have to carry the car seat to the car. So far, the car seat is my worst choice for going out on my own, and I've only taken her out in it once when not getting a ride. The stroller's ok for shopping at the mall near here, but if I'm going on a bus it's a pain to lift it on and off. The Snuggli is gradually becoming a favorite. I tried it out for the first time on Monday and both Harmony and I like it. Because she's so small she doesn't quite fit into her snowsuit and sinks into it with the arm holes around her ears! This keeps her nice and tucked in and she's definetely never cold when I take her out.
My figure is slowly getting back into shape, but I'm still not even close to fitting back into my normal pants. I don't want to wear maternity pants and my overalls aren't that great for breastfeeding, so I think getting a new pair of pants with a loose waist would be a good idea.

Continue to the next week...